the real me :)

the real me :)

Monday, November 29, 2010

bakit ganun?


hmp .. bkit kea ganun? kung cnu pa ung taong ayaw mu mwala un pa ung dapat umiwas? hays .. samantalng ndi mu alam ung 2nay na dahilan? bkit kea? hindi ko alam kung tama ung cnabe sakin ng isang kaibigan na kea xa ganun dahil sa mahal nia ko .. pero bkit ganun? mahal ko na ata xa.. hindi ko alam, ayokong mag kamali ng desisyon, hays ..

sana magaing ok ulit kame .. gs2 ko maging aus ulit ung sming dalwa .. bkit kase nag ka gan2 ee, kung alam ko lng na gan2 ung mangyayre d ko na sana tinuloy . ngaun alam ko na mas mahal ko xa kesa sa past . sana kase xa nlng ung una kong nkilala at minahal ..hindi ko alam kapag nantili xang galit skin , sana maging ok na kame , ang daming tanong sa isaip ko .

bkit ba xa galit skin? anu ba ang kasalanan ko? hindi naman kasalanan ang mag mahal hindi ba? kusa ko un naramdaman kahit alam kong mali, pinigilan ko namn ee. para hindi mag ka gulo pero anu mag2wa ko mahl ko tlga xa..

ayokong mawala xa skin .. mhal ko tlga xa.. bkit ba kase nag ka ganto ee.. hays .. tapos neun ako ang nahi2rapan .. :'( dunno what to do ..

why can't it be?

(bear-stick)



Monday, November 15, 2010

let go of the past !

tama na panggap .. tigil na ! pinahihirapan mu lang xa ee.. mahal ka nia pero hindi para sayo un .. dahil iba ang pakilala mo .. hays .. mga kalokohan mu kase .. kala mu mganda pero hindi naman .. iniisip mu lang kase ung sarili mu ee.. iniisip mu lang ung kaligayahan muh ..

ang selfish mu kase ee .. kala mu aman npka ganda ng ginwa mu .. tsk tsk .. tapos ngaun aun na ung ngyare .. panu kapag nalaman nia eun d lagot na .. hmmn .. makulit ka kase .. pilit ka pa ng pilit wla nmn na talga .. tama na ung ngyare nuon .. dahil kahit kelan hindi ka nia magu2shan ,.. pilit pa ng pilit .. iba ang gs2 nia .. ok .. DAPAT MUNG INTINDIHIN YON ..

dahil kahit kelan hindi ka nia magu2shan .. itatak mu sa utak mu eun .. hindi magi2ng kau ok .. hanggang pangarap ka na lng .. matagal na niang cnabe seo un .. nung bday mu nga hindi xa nag atubiling pumunta , a2sa kapa .. tama na .. pahi2rapan mu lng sarili muh .. at khit naman nung umpisa hindi ka nia ngus2han .. kapatid lng ang 2ring nia sau .. hanggang dun lng un ..

sinundan mu pa xa sa METRO para mapansin ka .. pero hindi ka din namn nag tagal .. kase xa din ang dhilan kung bakit ka nag kaganun .. dhil sa nalaman mu na nging sila ng kapatid mo .. tama na asa .. kawawa ka lng sobra .. pinag mu2ka mung tanga ung sarili muh .. sa kakahabol sa knya ..

gumising ka na .. wala ka ng mag2wa .. AYAW nia SEO .. taNdaan mu ean .. at khit kelan hindi ka nia magu2s2han .. pag nasaktan ka i2yak ka .. iniiyakan mu ung tao na khit kelan hindi ka pinhalgahan .. tsk tsk .. MOVE ON .. LET GO OF THE PAST ! dami ng naapek2han na buhay .. lalo kana .. imbis na mging masaya ka hindi mu mgawa .. WAKE UP !!


(sad but definitely true .. e2 tlga ung gingwa ko .. :'( )

Sunday, November 14, 2010

[HD] Mahal Kita Kasi by Toni Gonzaga (My Amnesia Girl theme song)

another message from him :'(

last night e2 ung txt nia :

" I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR MAKING MY HEART BEAT PERFECTLY ONCE AGAIN! I LOVE YOU YOU .. "

sarap tlga pakinggan, kasu hindi para skin ee..

" ok lng pu un.. ang mahalaga.. alam natin na mahal natin ang isa't isa .. the word GIRLFRIEND is just a title but the word LOVE is a feeling that is incomparable. "

tpus e2 naman ung kaninang madaling araw ..

" To find someone who will never make you cry is impossible. Get the next best thing. Find someone who's worth all the pain. "

" I'll stick with what you said. I'll never expect 2 much .. :'( "

hays ! sana tlga skin ung mga msg na un .. niyaya nia pako manuod ng sine . kasu hindi ako pumyag, kapag nalaman nia un .. paktay na !! hays .. kalokohan ko tlga !

mawa2la nlng ako bigla .. hindi mag pa2ramdam sknya .. kalungkot tlga ! sana ako nalng ung sinsabihan nia ng ganun ..

Saturday, November 13, 2010

D I F F E R E N C E S B E T W E E N L O V E A N D L I K E

In front of the person you love, your heart beats faster But in front of the person you like , you get happy.

In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring But in front of the person you like, winter is just a beautiful winter.

If you look into the eyes of the one you love, you blush But if you look into the eyes of the one you like, you smile.

In front of the person you love, you can' t say everything on your mind But in front of the person you like, you can.

In front of the person you love, you tend to get shy But in front of the person you like, you can show your own self.

Then person you love comes into your mind every 2 minutes. You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you love But you can always smile into the eyes of the one you like.

When the one you love is crying, you cry with them But when the one you like is crying, you end up comforting.

The feeling of love starts from the eye And the feeling of like starts from the ear.

So if you stop liking a person you used to like All you need to do is cover your ears, But if you try to close your eyes Love turns into a drop of tear and remains in your heart forever after.

Love Story: Fairy Tale Love.

Love Story: Fairy Tale Love.

By: Devan

Never in my life did I imagine a love like this. Never in my life did I dream it possible for such a love to find me. Never in my life did I think there was someone so astounding out there. Well never in my life have I stepped outside of my own little world and my own little group of friends.. 8 months ago I did and couldn’t believe what I found.

I was a sophomore. He was a junior. We both ran track - his first year and my second.

He was beautfiul, flawless. He was funny and full of joy. You could tell just by looking at him. He was the kind of guy every girl dreams of. One day, he asked a mutual friend for my number, and from that moment on, I’ve never laid eyes on another. We cheered each other on at the following track meet, and we both won our races because of it. The bus back to school was practically empty except for the few seats in the back with one person sprawled out over every two seats. He chose to sit by me even though 20 other seats sat vacant. Spring break came the following week, I hated the thought of going away for a week before we got a chance to hang out for real.. What if he found another girl in Miami? What if I screwed up in Panama City? What if the week’s time snapped him back to reality and he came to his senses? Friday before spring break - He texted me in the middle of class. He was leaving early. I left the classroom to go to the “bathroom” and he met up with me. If you could dream of a perfect hug, this was it. We talked for a few minutes until our principal noticed us.. Then I went back to class and he set off on his trip. I was so happy and so sad at the same time. A week was too long. I had to see him again, but I had no other choice than to wait. Two Sundays later we hung out. He was too shy to hold my hand and I had to fight off the urge of reaching out and grabbing his. I didn’t want to scare him away by being the one to make the first move. He started to play with my hand, maybe to try to hold it, but it never worked. The next week he met up with me at a ballpark around where we live. I was there with friends and he lived in the neighborhood across the street. This time, something was different. He got there, and he didn’t even hesitate.. From the start he was holding me. His arms wrapped tightly around me, hands locked and intertwined with mine, and the sureness of him was apparent. I knew it now. I knew I wasn’t the only one feeling this. From that moment on, we were inseparable. It took us another week or so before we shared in our first REAL kiss. And the next day, when he walked me to my door, he asked me to be his girlfriend. ME? I was shocked! I said yes and tried to keep my cool. The SECOND I got through my front door I was jumping, squealing, screaming, dancing, and everything. Embarrassingly, I got straight on facebook and switched my relationship status to in a relationship. I was just so excited for the whole world to know.

We’ve had amazing times together. For example -

* We were watching the Notebook at his house and it was POURING down rain.. He knows how much I love the rain, so regardless of everything going on, we bolted out into the rain together. He tricked me though.. He picked me up and kissed me and ac ted like he was going to just hold me.. then he laid me down in a HUGE puddle and I had to change into his clothes.. Except it was pointless because we ended up going right back outside and doing the exact same thing. BEST DAY OF MY LIFE. So much fun.

*We went to Helen with his stepmom and her parents for a weekend. Neither of texted anyone or anything the whole weekend pretty much. WE spent the weekend hanging out just as two at their cabin. Four wheeling, putt putting, chocolate covered strawberries, swings, fish that suck your fingers that he helped me become unafraid of, and so much more.

*Waking up after a nap at his house, I couldn’t find him anywhere.. I get up to turn around to look for him and next to where my head had been sleeping there was a note and a HUGE stuffed gorilla for me.

* One day after school I had to go straight to the elementary school up the street to teach the little kids french. I was there for an hour or so, and then I went outside to my car.. It’s raining.. I go to turn on my windshield wipers and realized something.. There was a single red rose on my windshield under the wiper.. along with a yellow note inside a baggy so it wouldn’t get wet.

*and MANYYYYYYYYYY more.

8 months now, and I’m crazy in love. No, I’m MADLY in love. I know this was a gift sent from God and I know he believes the same. We were both at unhappy and bad places in our live. He’d been dealt some pretty horrible cards and been through things no 17 year old should ever have to go through and then it lead him down the wrong path.. and me? I was at the point where I had completely given up and felt unwanted. Happiness wasn’t going to happen for me and love wasn’t an option because no one seemed interested and the few that ever were.. weren’t what I needed. He exceeded my expectations, still does.

16 and a junior - 18 and a senior - track quickly approaching again, and I still only have eyes for him. I don’t care how young I am. I don’t care how short we’ve been together. When you know, you know. When things work out perfectly and you never even argue, you know you were blessed. Just because I’m young and only 8 months into a relationship doesn’t mean anything. Love is rare. Those who find it are lucky and have to embrace it. So here I am, embracing it with everything I have.

message nia skin ! sarap pakinggan ..

gs2 daw ako makita ng mga friends nia sa skul nia !

" kc naki2ta nila ko na lageng masaya. tinanung nila qng bkit? ang sabe ko kc s wakas, dumating na ung taong mag pa2saya sakin 4 d rest of my life eh. tawa nga cla ng tawa eh, korny q daw. sabi q d bale ng korny bsta mapakita q s knya na inlove aq sknya at mahal q xa "

sarap talga pakinggan , lalo na kung ako ung tinu2koy nia .. kasu ndi ee..

another msg from him :

" ok let's sleep na. i'll imagine u lying beside me,hugging me so tight nd feel ur heartbeat knowing that it beats compatibly wid my heart. . . I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ALYSSA ANNE SANTOS! I LOVE YOU ANNEL KO! MWUUAH. "

much better sana kung ung msg eh ganto ee..

" ok let's sleep na. i'll imagine u lying beside me,hugging me so tight nd feel ur heartbeat knowing that it beats compatibly wid my heart. . . I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ALMIRA MENDOZA! I LOVE YOU RANNEL KO! MWUUAH. "

haist ! kasu hindi ee.. lalu ku lng pinahi2rapan sarili ko ee.. muka lang akong tanga .. ako inlove saknya pero sya inlove sa ibang katauhan .. sa katauhan na hindi naman 22o .. pero ako 22o hindi nia kayang mahalin .. hays.. :'(

he told me that he love me ! :'( (but it's not for me)

tsk tsk .. aun na nga ung kinakatakutan cu ee.. mag ka txt nga kame . kasu ang alam nia ibang tao , cnabe nia skin na ang gaan daw ng lood nia skin . parang ang tagal na daw nia ko kilala .. d truth is kilala nia tlga ako . hays ! panu kaya ito , cnabe nia na want nia manligaw! pero hindi pede , dhil laht ng gingawa ko puro kasinungalingan, hays ! panu kea toh .. malaking gulo 2ng ginwa ko ee .. panigurado .. hays ..

kapag nag pa2loy toh panigurado mag2lit xa skin .. mhal ko tlga xa.. iba ung saya ko ee.. kapag nag te2xt xa. at he want's me to be his girl .. ang sarap pakinggan ang kaso hindi para skin un .. :'( gan2 nlng ba ako? a2sa sa LONG LOST FRiEND ko? hays .. kung alam lang nia talaga .. hmp ..

anu kea pede kong gawin para mapansin nia ako .. sana hindi na matapos 2ng kalokohan ko .. sna hindi na lng nia malamn ung 22o .. sana tlga .. kung malamn man nia .. sna mapatawad njia ako ..

Thursday, November 11, 2010

the past is back !

tsk tsk ! he's back ! but hindi nia alam na ako ung katxt nia , gs2 kung sabihin ksu pag nalaman nia na ako un, panigurado hindi xa mag te2xt , and i want to say sorry dhil sa nag cnungaling ako saknya .. gs2 ko lng nmn xa makatxt khit dun lng ! gs2 ko maka help sknya kahit sa txt lng.

pero sana kapag nlaman nia na ako un, sna wag xa mgalit skin ! khit manlans dun maka2long ako saknya! khit lbasan lng ng sama ng loob .. yeah ! dami na naming napag daanan , en i think he's my first love ! ika nga first love never die ! well that's true.. until now im inlove with him, but not totally inlove aun ung pag naki2ta ko xa kinukilig ako :) para kong bumbalik sa pag kabata! ung high school na kapag naki2ta ung crush 2do kilig .. hihi !

kahit d2 manlang sa gingwa ko napa2saya nako ! super happy ko ! pero syempre lhat may katapusan :| at alam ko na maga2lit xa skin, pero sana isipin nia na kea ko ngawa un dhil gs2 ko xang makatext ! at makausap ..

sorry if nag sisinungaling ako .. hope you understand !

Saturday, November 6, 2010

pang gulo ka ee!

masaya na kame ee .. bkit ka paba kase dumating sa buhay ko?

tignan mu nangyare? magulo na! ginulo mo kame .. pati ako ginulo muh, tapos pinramdam mu pa skin na mahal mu ako .. pero ang 22o hindi tlaga !pumasok ka lng sa buhay ko para mang gulo .. pinag sisihan ko na kung bkit kita nagus2han , at kung bakit kita pinag ta2nggol sa kanila .. nkakaasar ka ..

sabe mu rain or shine pu2ntahan mu ako .. pero anu ngyare? iniwan mu ako sa ere .. gs2 ko magalit seo pero bkit hindi ko mgawa .. bkit kba kase gnyan huh? masaya na kame eh! pero bkit ka pa pumasok sa mundo ko ? anung intensyon muh ..??

pinag si2han ko kung bkit kita hinyaan na pasukin ung mundo ko, at kung bkit kita hinayaan na guluhin mu kame .. nka2asar ka .. alam ko may kasalanan din ako .. npka lake ng kasalanan ko sa taong mahala ko ng sobra !

kung hindi ka dumating sa buhay namin d sana hindi kame gan2 ngaun .. hindi sna ako gan2 sknya neun .. nkakainis ka .. pati ung walang alam nada2may dhil sa mga ginwa mu .. hanggat maari ayokong mkita ka ! pero bkit hinhanap kita?

sbihin mu nga skin? anu ang dapat kong gawin .. para maitama ko lhat ng mali .. para maibalik ko ung dati , para maging ok ulit kame? kung hindi ka sna pumasok sa buhay namin d sana masaya kame ..

galit ako sayo ! dhil seo kea gan2 kame .. sobra akong galit !! i hate you ..

it could be GOODBYE?


GOODBYE nba tLga?

bakit ganun? ndi ko alam 2ng nararamdaman ko, hindi ko mlaman kung anu ba tlga ung gs2 ko! halos wala na kong nara2mdman for him .. pero bkit hindi ko masbe sknya na AYOKO na .. nu ba dpat kong gawin at sabihin?

kagabe naramdaman ko ung mga hinanakit nya sakin , dhil sa hindi ko xa pinpansin .. bkit ganun ako? bkit ba ako naiirita na sknya? ang gulo gulo ko tlga ! pano ko ba sa2bihin sa isang taong ayaw mu na? ng hindi xa nasasaktan? panu ba mag paalam sa isang tao na , ikaw ang buhay niya?

alam ko namang kaya nya kahit wala ako ee.. eh ako kay ko ba? hindi ko tlga alam ang gus2 ko .. mahal nia daw ako, peor bkit hindi ko nararamdaman? MANHID nba ako? o may MAHAL LNG AKONG IBA?

pero cnu ung ibang un? tsk tsk ! anu ba tlga ang nangyayare skin? bkit hindi ko maintindhan ang sarili ko ..

kailangan ko makapag isip ng maayos.. dapat wag na 2 patagalin dhil lala lang to lalo .. :'(